Great shoes

‘Great shoes,’ I say, as I walk past a young person in the train station. I didn’t mean to say it out loud, but I did – and I smiled – and they grinned back and said ‘Thanks!’ – and we each wandered off towards our respective destinations. It was the smile that generated the response, I think, and perhaps the oddness of a stranger making a random (but pleasant) comment. Just a passing interaction, not important in any way, but it felt like the smile we shared made us each stand a little taller and, maybe, look out at the world a wee bit more positively.

After a couple of stops I couldn’t have described those shoes, but I could definitely describe the feeling of lightness at their wearer’s response. Each time I thought about it, I smiled again, and thought about how little it takes to make the day feel brighter.

I find trains are good places to think and to write and, on that day, my contemplations inevitably came round to the little acts of kindness that happen all around us every day, despite the wild hurly burly of the wider world. They’re the sort of things that it’s easy to take for granted, even though they shouldn’t be.

I thought about how my day had started – delicious freshly brewed coffee delivered with a smile and a kiss, shared over some companionable early morning chit chat. Then, once Himself had left for the day, finding that the dishwasher had been stealthily unpacked and the kitchen compost bin quietly emptied when I wasn’t looking. So, instead of rushing around before leaving, I had long enough to take a breath, chat to the chooks and admire their new feathers when I went out to feed them, then gather my paraphernalia and calmly head off to the train station with time to spare. So, thanks for the coffee, dear-one, and all the many other things you do. I don’t keep a ledger, but if I did it would be full to bursting. No wonder I smiled at a perfect stranger!

In the mish-mash of daily life it’s these small kindnesses that can – and often do – make a big difference. Some are tangible, others less so – a cuppa, a small task done quietly to ease the pressure, produce shared with a friend or neighbour, a smile, holding a door open for someone, saying thank you, allowing a vehicle to merge into the traffic front of you, and so on. These small acts aren’t transactional in the way of something to be bartered for profit; they’re about an outlook, about taking the time to be courteous, to make the difference to someone’s day.

Later on I came across a poem, beautifully read by Helen Bonham Carter. It encapsulates much of what I was thinking – but more clearly, perhaps. Listen to it if you have some time to spare.

… and sometimes, when you spill lemons
from your grocery bag, someone else will help you
pick them up. Mostly, we don’t want to harm each other…

From “Small Kindnesses” – Bonfire Opera by Danusha Laméris, © 2020.

Back home I smile as I chat to my fluffy winter chooks, tomorrow I’ll take my spare lemons to the community centre to share with others and I’ll remember to say thank you when someone stands aside for me in a doorway. It doesn’t take much.